


Fix my soul so I don't lose a love again

by WaterSeraphim



Category: Magic: The Gathering (Card Game)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining, Unresolved Romantic Tension, post Forsaken
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-16
Updated: 2019-11-16
Packaged: 2021-01-31 13:13:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21446764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WaterSeraphim/pseuds/WaterSeraphim
Summary: Jace wants to apologize for leaving Ravnica, but Ral isn’t exactly the same man he was before. Things go better than he expected.
Relationships: Jace Beleren/Ral Zarek, Jace Beleren/Tomik Vrona, Jace Beleren/Tomik Vrona/Ral Zarek, Tomik Vrona/Ral Zarek
Comments: 2
Kudos: 29





	Fix my soul so I don't lose a love again

**Author's Note:**

> In a Jesguys writing mood. Just been a feels machine lately wanted to have jace and ral talk
> 
> Un-beta’ed. Mistakes are my own
> 
> also using song lyrics as titles will never fail.

It had taken Jace longer than he’d care to admit to find Zarek’s house, especially considering the man was apparently Guildmaster now. When Lavinia told him he laughed and laughed and then realized she wasn’t joking. 

_ Ral Zarek? Really? Are you sure?  _

A lot had happened while he was gone.

Jace found himself at the doorstep of a cozy apartment in a cozy district that did not at all look like somewhere he’d expect Zarek to live. It would be easy for Jace to pick the lock and slip inside, but that would be rude.

So he knocked and waited.

A particularly haggard looking Ral Zarek opened the door and visibly drooped when he saw that it was Jace. Expecting someone else, then.

Zarek sighed and rubbed at his bruised jaw. His face was particularly mangled, his lips were swollen and his eyes were purple. He had a thick scar running into his hairline and his signature frizz had been shaved off. If he didn’t know better he wouldn’t even recognize him. 

“Jace… what are you doing here?” Zarek poked his head out the crack in the door, but didn’t yet invite him inside.

“I came to talk.”

Zarek frowned and looked at him, really looked at him for a pause that seemed to stretch for eternity. Jace was starting to feel uncomfortable with the silence between them when Zarek raised an eyebrow and asked, “Did you get a tan?”

He couldn’t help but laugh. “Something like that.”

Zarek offered a small smile and stepped aside. The gentle expression was one he’d never quite seen before on the storm mage. It looked… nice. 

That wasn’t the only thing that looked nice. Zarek was wearing more casual clothes than Jace was used to. Instead of his usual Izzet themed attire he was in a loose top and a pair of trousers that hugged his long legs.

It was bizarre to fixate on, but Jace was amazed by seeing Zarek’s neck free from any adornment. It was a sunny day on Ravnica when he went without wearing a scarf or wrap around his shoulders. He looked more human, more vulnerable without it. 

And he was tall, much taller than Jace. His messy brown hair only reached Zarek’s stubbled chin. Usually he hated it, feeling small reminded him of all the things he disliked about himself. But next to Zarek it wasn’t like that. It was almost… attractive. He could appreciate his size, the width of his shoulders and their contrast to his slim hips. His arms trained to handle heavy equipment fit with lean muscle. He didn’t cut an intimidating figure, his presence didn’t make Jace aware of his own body. It just made him want to see  _ more  _ of Zarek’s. 

“Come in.” He gestured Jace inside, holding the door open for him. 

He was grateful that he was the only telepath in the room.

Jace’s shoes were quiet on the wooden floor of Zarek’s apartment. It was nothing like how he’d expect a mad scientist’s home to look like. A decent size, a warm inviting atmosphere, and very neat. There were no machines strewn about, no spare parts or strange devices being worked on. Just… furniture.

The door shut quietly behind him.

Jace turned to look at Zarek, searching for a hint of malice and found none. He looked tired and worn but  _ happy.  _ It was strange to see him smiling about something that didn’t involve blowing things up. All of this was  _ strange. How had he changed so much? _

Zarek offered to take his cloak and hang it up for him, he politely declined. He didn’t intend to stay for long.

Jace sighed and said, “I came here to apologize.”

“Huh.” Zarek’s hand ran through the fuzzy hairs on his head. It was hard for Jace to look at him directly, seeing him so damaged made guilt swell in his gut. He didn’t know why, but he felt responsible. Zarek was a proud, cocky, confident man. He shouldn’t look humiliated, he shouldn’t be broken. Not like this. “I’m not a priest.”

Jace crossed his arms and muttered, “This isn’t a confession.”

Zarek inhaled deeply, like he was holding himself back from going on a tirade. Or maybe he was just tired from the past few days. He looked exhausted, that was for sure. He angled his head upwards, revealing a large expanse of his tanned neck. “Why do you think you should apologize to me, Jace?”

When he had decided to come here he expected the man to gloat, to mock Jace for his absence. It would have been so easy to pin all the blame on him. He found himself doing that exact thing again and again. “Have you looked outside lately? The world is in ruins because of me.”

Zarek frowned and walked through the small foyer into a separate room. “Let’s sit.”

Jace followed as Zarek led him into the living area. He gingerly sat down, gesturing for Jace to do the same on a chair next to him. “Sure, things may have gone smoother if you were around. You also would have been Bolas’ highest priority for a political assassination.”

“That doesn’t matter, I should have been there. You shouldn’t have had to deal with all of this alone. The guilds were my responsibility and I neglected then. It was  _ my  _ job, and you were forced into doing it for me. I failed this plane, I failed the guilds, and I certainly failed you.”

It was good to finally tell someone, even if it hurt.

“You didn’t fail me, Jace,” Zarek inhaled in surprise. He leaned forward in his seat, bringing himself closer to Jace. Even so bruised he looked handsome with his strong jaw and sharp cheekbones. He was all too aware that Zarek’s face was barely a foot away from his own. Pale green eyes refused to look anywhere else but Jace’s blue. “I… No. You didn’t fail me.”

He smelled like rain.

The front door opened again and Jace jumped away from Zarek like he’d been caught doing something he shouldn’t have. 

“Ral! I’m sorry I’m late. I had to meet with Bilagru about the damages to-“

The man paused as he noticed Jace sitting across from who he’d been talking to.

Perhaps not noting the sudden shift in mood or ignoring it altogether Zarek purred, “I missed you, angel.”

There was a fondness in his voice that sounded completely alien to Jace. Was that a pet name? Since when did Zarek care about other forms of life that weren’t himself?

Zarek didn’t move, he only welcomed the newcomer with a warm smile. The man was dressed all in white and gold with expensive flowing fabrics. Jace recognized him from the final battle with Bolas but couldn’t remember his name. It was very Ravnican and rolled off the tongue with an aristocratic flair… 

“As far as I was aware, I’m not an angel.”

“You look like one,” Zarek grinned.

The man blushed and played with his golden frames. “Stop it.”

“It’s true.”

He had been fighting the eternals—if you could call it  _ fighting.  _ The man’s skill with a sword was abysmal at best, his balance was all off and his grip was rigid. He did manage to kill one or two lazotep warriors on his own just from the raw size advantage he held and the almost ethereal grace he seemed to possess. His swordplay was terrible but he moved like a dancer, perhaps with some training he could take Jace in a duel.

It’d been a bit since he’d practiced, though. 

Zarek went to stand but the man wouldn’t have it. His heels clicked on the wooden floor as he hurried over and pulled Zarek into a very intimate  _ private  _ kiss. It had Jace feeling like a spectator, an invader in their domestic life. 

He should go.

But then the man turned to him with his honey eyes and tender smile and offered up a hand. He bent over in a way that placed him at eye level with the sitting Jace. It was a simple thing that meant a whole world of a difference to make him feel more comfortable. Jace clasped his own  _ smaller  _ hand around it and shook weakly. 

“Please excuse my manners. Good evening, Mister Beleren. I don’t believe we’ve officially met before.”

Not what he used to be, what he was. No venom on his tongue spitting out insults, no judgemental tone. No  _ former Living Guildpact _ , no  _ thought stealer, mindmage.  _ Just  _ Mister Beleren.  _

_ And that’s all I’ve ever really been. _

Jace’s mouth fell open a little. Zarek was living with one of the most attractive people in the multiverse. His brown tousled hair looked so soft, his plush red lips so kissable. His skin was pale and dotted with freckles. Along with a jaw so strong that it made Zarek’s look weak in comparison. Even his hand was smooth as silk, so nice… 

He was holding onto the man for too long.  _ Normal people don’t stare like this. Oh they probably think I’m an idiot. Well, Zarek already thought that, but now his lover-boyfriend-something would as well.  _

Jace didn’t even know that Zarek liked men. This was a very educational visit.

“It’s good to meet you…” his chest felt hollow. He was about to jump out the window for not even knowing this  _ angel _ ’s name.

“Tomik,” he laughed, it was a pleasant sound.

“Tomik,” Jace agreed. It suited him perfectly.

Everything would have been so much easier if he peeked inside of Tomik’s mind. This was something new, this understand others and respecting their boundaries. Though Zarek would probably bolt him if he even thought about messing with his partner’s head anyway.

“No, I think I would remember meeting you,” Jace said breathlessly. Tomik laughed again making his chest flutter.

They were still holding hands.

“You sure?” Zarek looked between him and Tomik with an unreadable expression. His green gaze fell back to his handsome partner and they locked eyes as he continued, “I recall you and memory not being on the best of terms.”

They went to pull away at the same time, breaking their hands apart. Jace’s face was still very warm.

“You’ve changed.” It was plain to see, almost everything he’d known about Ral Zarek had been completely wrong or vanished over his absence. They hadn’t talked in months, almost a year, and even then it’s not like they were ever close. They worked together out of necessity, not companionship. By the waters of Ixalan and the depths of memory Jace Beleren wasn’t the same man as he was then, either. A certain captain had helped a great deal in reminding him of that. “So have I.” 

“He has, I couldn’t be more proud of him.” Tomik smiled as he made to leave the room, but was sure he didn’t turn his face away from Jace as he spoke. Maintaining that eye contact to keep Jace from feeling ignored or abandoned. His subtle understanding of body language was impressive. “Isn’t Ral dreamy?”

Jace found himself nodding before he realized he probably shouldn’t be so honest with Zarek right next to him. A cautionary glance showed that said man was watching him curiously. Jace inwardly cursed his error, his heart leaping from his chest. 

He gulped.

Tomik shot Jace a knowing look as his heels clicked his way to the kitchen. “Where are my manners! I’ll be right back with tea.”

Jace preferred coffee, but making that distinction felt rude given the circumstances. He didn’t feel up to staying long enough for a drink. He’d already embarrassed himself enough in front of Zarek during the last five minutes to last a lifetime. “Thank you, but that won’t be necessary-”

Zarek’s thoughts filtered into his head like a stream flowing into the ocean. It was so sudden, jarring, it had Jace jumping out of his skin.  _ Take the tea _ .  _ It’s an Orzhov custom. _

“Though, tea does sound nice!” Jace squeaked.

_ Good boy. _

Those words sent a shiver of  _ something  _ rolling through him. He couldn’t help but focus his attention on Zarek grinning face. 

_ Zarek? _

_ Is something wrong, Jace?  _ He knew, he definitely knew. Nothing was ever unintentional with a man like him. So being a flirt was one thing that Zarek had retained despite everything else.

_ Nevermind.  _ Jace rubbed at his eyes to hide the red tinting his cheeks.  _ Since when did you  _ want  _ me in your head, Zarek? _

_ Why don’t you call me Ral? _ He almost looked hurt.  _ Am I wrong to trust you? _

_ No… Ral. I’m just surprised. You never liked me in here before. _

This time he spoke verbally, his voice low and serious. “I thought you were dead.”

“Oh,” Jace frowned and pulled his cloak a little tighter. 

“No one had heard from you in months. I didn’t think you were coming back.” Ral offered up his hand which Jace took after some hesitation. His calloused fingers smoothed over Jace’s skin in soothing circles. “I’m glad I was wrong.”

Wetness was welling up in the corners of his eyes, he used his blue sleeve to wipe them away. Ral missing him was something Jace had never expected. He thought Ral hated him, blamed him for everything. Now he was discovering that couldn’t be further from the truth.

“I came to apologize,” Jace whispered. Half reminding himself, and half out of some sort of self motivation. The presence of another in the room had sapped the courage he’d arrived with.

“You did,” Ral agreed.

“I’m sorry about Tezzeret.”

Ral’s expression changed rapidly, his entire body tensed, his mouth drawing into a thin line. 

Jace continued, “I could have helped you. I used to work with him. I knew him. I’ve killed him before.”

Though ‘killed’ was a much gentler word than he’d use to describe what he’d done. Mutilated his body, destroyed his mind. Became the monster everyone thought he was.

“You didn’t know,” Ral choked out. He pulled away, removing his hold on Jace and dejectedly dropping his own hand in his lap. His eyes were glued to them sitting between his knees. Long and slender, fingers curling and clenching into fists. They were covered in bruises just like his face. “Niv-Mizzet kept us from telling you.”

Jace didn’t know how to respond to that so he didn’t.

Tomik returned with the tea once again altering the mood of the room with his arrival. He was struggling to hold the three mugs in his arms at the same time but managed to make it work. 

Ral was still staring at his hands.

As Tomik placed the mugs down on the coffee table he frowned. Shooting a concerned glance over to Ral before smiling at Jace. 

“I made chai tea for you, I thought you’d prefer something sweeter.”

Jace’s eyes fell to Tomik’s smiling lips. He could go for something sweet right now, but he didn’t have tea in mind. 

“Thank you, Tomik.” Jace attempted to sound like the man’s presence wasn’t turning him into a flustered mess. 

He blew the steam away from his tea before tasting a sip. It  _ was  _ sweet, but it was also fantastic. He watched over the rim of his mug as Tomik slid in beside Ral and pressed close to him. 

The two of them seemed to have a language of their own. They weren’t mind mages like Jace, but they didn’t have to speak with words. Ral was looking at Tomik in a way that left Jace breathless. Tomik curled a hand around his stubbled jaw and pressed a chaste kiss to his bruised cheek. Ral looked away and smiled.

That same invasive feeling was creeping up again until Tomik turned to him and asked, “So Jace, do you plan to stay on Ravnica?” Always making him comfortable, always aware of how the people around him were feeling.

“I was planning to travel to a plane called Vryn after this visit. This was my last stop.” Jace rubbed at his neck sheepishly. “Vryn. It’s… where I’m from.”

That admission caught Ral’s attention. Long ago they’d had a conversation on the topic of home. He remembered the way Ral had looked at him, it made him question a lot of things. His feelings, what they could have been if they met under better circumstances. But mainly he wondered how his life would have changed if Ravnica  _ was  _ his plane. Jace hadn’t known about Vryn back then, he’d only regained those memories recently. 

“Ditching Ravnica?” Ral frowned. He looked disappointed. “I thought  _ this  _ was your home?”

And in a way it was, but not like Ral. He didn’t have roots here, he’d been convinced that no one had felt his absence. Sure the people would miss the Living Guildpact, but how many missed  _ Jace Beleren?  _ He was pleased to discover he’d been wrong.

“I’ve never really felt like I belonged somewhere before,” Jace admitted into his tea. “Every plane is temporary until the next one. Ravnica means so much to me but… my parents are on Vryn. I haven’t seen them since I was a kid. They haven’t seen  _ me  _ since I was a kid. If there’s a chance of me connecting with a home, _ a real one _ , I have to take it.”

Tomik smiled again, as heartstopping and beautiful as all the rest. “I hope you find what you’re searching for.” He was so much better with words than Jace could ever be. This man was a calming force, and at once Jace understood a great many things.

In the end, love was what changed Ral. Not time, nor the burden of responsibility. He met someone that made him want to be better, to be someone worth loving. 

_ Perhaps _ , he mused,  _ it’s the same way for me. _

Ral sighed before nodding in agreement. “And if Vryn isn’t everything you wanted, Ravnica will still be here waiting for you.”

Tentative thoughts once again crept into the air from Ral’s head.  _ We’ll still be here, Tomik and I. If you need us, just ask. _

_ Thank you. _

  
  
  
  



End file.
